I have a kid who would come home every day and say he didn’t have any homework; he didn’t really seem to know what was going on in school or how it linked to his assignments. He acted as if his part of school was over because he went, survived and now he was home. School in his brain was . . . done. He acted with surprise and defiance, often with tantrums; he was annoyed that he was expected to write in an agenda and keep his assignments organized. He wasn’t able to make the connection that success in school would mean privileges at home. School wasn’t the only source of our child’s frustration. There was an unending flood of conflict and turmoil in dealing with siblings, friends, small disappointments, and inappropriate attention-seeking behaviors. Daily living was exhausting, to say the least.

Through use of an analogy about a sleeping director and a cloudy camera lens the phrase “Let Me Be Your Camera” was born. Our son’s comprehension of his disability, his strengths, and his weaknesses deepened exponentially. The analogy allowed him to see and understand what once was hidden. We applied strategies such as: a cognitive journal, externalization, self talk, preview / check in / review, repeat back to me, and commercial breaks, to name a few, that addressed social and behavioral issues. He slowly gained success with regard to obtaining more social privileges with his friends. We had him hooked! We then built some strategies aimed at helping him with succeeding at organization, home work completion, task completion, chore completion and more. He has been practicing the strategies for eighteen months, and we see gradual but consistent progress. He has good grades with no zeroes in the first nine weeks of school, and he acknowledges that he has homework to do and begins as soon as he gets home. Increasingly he accepts more personal responsibility, he trusts and accepts our feedback, and is beginning to apply it on behalf of himself — self-advocacy.

I am an elementary school principal and former middle school teacher/administrator, and high school coach. Together with my wife Lori, an educational diagnostician, we wrote a book for young adults at their level: Empowering Teens and Pre-Teens with AD/HD to Succeed, Not Just Survive. We used our experiences both as educators and the parents of a child with a disability to create a “blueprint” that is adaptable to children of all ages. The strategies reduce stress and conflict for parents and children, increase self-esteem and promote independence. As I speak to parent and teacher groups, and get feedback from those who are working our process, I am encouraged and hopeful.

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Let Me Be Your Camera

Part III – Learning Rx

by Beth Ardell

In 2003, my 1-year-old daughter had her first seizure and was subsequently diagnosed with a coordination disorder and hypotonia. As a physical therapist, I had a background in improving motor skills, although I had never worked in pediatrics. In an effort to help my growing daughter, I tried every intervention that made sense to me. Some I provided myself through my therapy background, and many others I researched and sought the best professionals to implement. I had no idea the struggles we faced over the next years would lead me to the most fulfilling profession I can imagine.

As she turned five, I realized my daughter struggled with cognitive impairments and learning differences, which shocked me more than her physical struggles. I know how painful it is for parents to realize their dreams for their children will not happen. In kindergarten, I moved my daughter to a new school where she could get the extra support she needed. There, she maintained a wonderful self-esteem, thanks to her positive inner spirit and the encouraging learning environment. But, I still worried about her future. If her skills remained at the level they were, how could she be independent or possibly pursue her career choice when she grew up? Academically, she was still having trouble in the new school, and I couldn’t imagine how she would survive if she couldn’t keep up with her peers.

As I continued to research and read about treatments, therapies and interventions, I discovered a program called LearningRx. I immediately liked what I saw and felt a sense of real hope! I learned more about weak cognitive skills and how the brain can be strengthened. Similar to having a personal trainer or physical therapist strengthen your muscles through exercise, LearningRx is having a personal cognitive trainer strengthen your brain through mental exercise. As a result, anyone can have a faster, stronger brain and an easier time with learning information.

I immediately shared the information with a friend who was interested in helping her child’s attention issues. What saddened and frustrated us was the absence of a LearningRx center in Georgia. We discussed what seemed like a far-reaching dream of opening a center of our own. We went to Colorado Springs, where the program is based, to observe the program in person. We both whole-heartedly agreed this was something we wanted for our children and for the learning differences community in Atlanta. The result: LearningRx Atlanta-Buckhead opened in March 2008.

Four years later, LearningRx Atlanta-Buckhead has seen hundreds of students of all ages, including mine. I have watched my daughter’s skills improve to the point where she does her fourth-grade homework by herself and gets great grades. More importantly, she now can follow conversations and communicate better, understand jokes, work faster and achieve more! She now has opportunities that were not possible to her before, and I am so thrilled I opened Learning Rx Atlanta-Buckhead to give this program to my daughter.

In addition to helping children like my mine, we have helped other students in competitive curriculums keep up with their peers when they were struggling. We’ve also helped students with diagnoses such as ADD/ADHD, dyslexia, Asperger’s and autism improve their underlying weak skills so they can focus, attend, read, and learn information efficiently and effectively. We even work with adults who want to advance their memory or multi-tasking skills to be more competitive in the workplace. There is no limit to what someone’s brain can achieve.

One dad with a son with Asperger’s reported at the end of his program, “It’s like I have a different child.” Those words have been so meaningful to me because I know exactly what he means by that statement. We also trained a 15-year-old student with Down’s syndrome whose mother said, “Nothing has ever given him these results. I have always been worried about what will happen to him if something happens to me…and now I know he’ll be okay.”

I truly feel passionate about what I do. Though it’s not always easy to run a business and take care of a family, I know I’ve been led down this road for a reason. I believe helping other parents is so important, because I’ve felt hopeless and fearful myself.

Now, I’m able to give the hope to others that LearningRx gave me. I have become close to many professionals and families whom I most likely would not have met, and I continue to learn from them. Every day I try to share my enthusiasm and optimism, and I experience unexplainable joy when I hear the words, “Thank you for helping my child.”

Beth Ardell
b.ardell@learningrx.net and 404-252-7246

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All in the Family: When a Diagnosis Leads to a Family Business or Nonprofit – Part III

Part IV – Under the Umbrella

by Jennifer Bennett

I am a mother of 10-year-old Mitchell, who has autism, and an 8-year-old daughter, Jordan. Several years ago, I realized there was a need for a safe and fun play center, where parents of special needs kids could drop off their kids and not feel worry or judgment. I wanted to provide a resource for parents who were in the same predicament I was. In September of 2010, I opened Under the Umbrella, the first drop-off play center in metro Atlanta that welcomed special needs children and their siblings.

I was a stay at home mom for 9 years before I opened Under the Umbrella. My son was diagnosed with autism at 3 1/2 years old, I had an infant as well, and my husband travelled all the time. I had no family in town either. There was housework to be done, doctor’s appointments to be made, insurance companies to deal with, and therapists to search for. Oh, and maybe find a few minutes to myself!

My biggest concern was the fear of the unknown. Having children before any of my friends made it that much more difficult. Where can I go to for that support I needed? I had two children, one with special needs. It throws you for a loop, but you keep chugging along. The playgroups I did join never felt quite right. I was always a bit embarrassed, yes embarrassed, that my son didn’t play like the other kids. Eventually I met some wonderful parents in the waiting rooms of therapy and doctor offices. I began to realize that I wasn’t the only one out there who had the same issues I did.

I just had an idea and ran it by some other parents and sort of cultivated this plan for Under the Umbrella. It took years before I actually could do it because I had to wait until both my kids were in school full time. Some of my ideas have changed throughout the process and they continue to change to fit the needs of the parents. I know what I need and I am always listening to parents, caregivers, therapists and teachers for what they need from Under the Umbrella.

Our first year of helping parents get some well-deserved time off went by in a flash! Children can play at Under the Umbrella for up to four hours while their parents and families run errands, meet appointments, see a movie or just take a break at Starbucks. Kids at Under the Umbrella are supervised in a safe, fun and interactive oasis.

Cynthia is a nanny who brings the kids to Under the Umbrella. She says, “We love coming to play Under the Umbrella each week! It is wonderful to see the children learn more about themselves as they have fun. The staff is great and they interact very well with the children each time we visit. It’s such a pleasant place for children and even parents to enjoy!”

According to SuperMom at TheSpecialGuide.com, “My daughter loves to play at Under the Umbrella. It’s a safe and a fun-filled sensory play center where I know she is being watched over and in safe hands. It’s a great facility where kids on the spectrum can have a great social outlet and it creates the unique opportunity to socialize with other kids similar to my daughter. This center gets two thumbs up!”

These testimonials have given me the strength to succeed in providing this special play place. I love seeing a child light up when they arrive or hearing that child’s sigh of disappointment when it is time to leave. Under the Umbrella keeps a smile on the parent’s faces as well!

Better Mornings Atlanta caught wind of our story and aired this following video.
Thank you so much for taking the time to read my story. I look forward to meeting you and your children at Under the Umbrella.

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All in the Family: When a Diagnosis Leads to a Family Business or Nonprofit – Part IV

While it may seem counterintuitive to suggest that holiday “vacation” is stressful, it certainly can be. This is especially true when you have children, whether one has special needs or not.

Start by recognizing when you or your family is out of balance. Are you feeling fatigued, or physically, emotionally, and mentally exhausted? Do you appear agitated, angry, frustrated, detached, or resentful? Are your children having difficulty listening or staying focused? Are they more impulsive and active, or more easily frustrated, argumentative, or hypersensitive?

Often these feelings begin well before December, as busy fall schedules and extracurricular activities might have already left you feeling overloaded. You may become so focused on what “must be done” that no family member is able to find enjoyment in any activity.

Add the daily media bombardment about how enchanting the season is supposed to be and your frustration may intensify. We hope to create lasting and meaningful family memories, but life’s everyday responsibilities can get in the way, particularly when we face economic hardships or belt tightening. Plus, the holidays quickly disrupt our typical routines. All of us handle life more effectively when we know what to expect and have a predictable schedule, but attaining that during the holidays can be difficult.

Once you have realized that you need to regain a sense of balance, take time to reassess how you approach this time of year. By doing so, you will increase everyone’s enjoyment. Here are a few tips to help you refocus your life:

1. Rein in the chaos
   Planning and setting realistic goals puts order into of a busy life. Work smarter rather than harder. Remember, small things can make a difference. Avoid over-scheduling and always have a contingency plan because emergencies are inevitable. Know what works best for your child; most kids like to know about upcoming plans in advance, while some children can’t handle the anticipation and need clear last-minute plans and directions. All children will do best when you are clear about your expectations for them.
2. Divide and conquer
   Don’t be afraid or embarrassed to ask for help from friends, family, neighbors, and colleagues. And accept help when it is offered. Learn how to delegate, and allow your children the responsibility for a specific task even if it won’t be completed exactly to your own satisfaction. Children gain confidence and a sense of belonging from being assigned age-appropriate household tasks and from learning to work together as a team. Break tasks into “do-able” components. Whenever possible, turn “unpleasant” duties into enjoyable ones for the whole family. Making a game out of a mundane task or rewarding the family when a job is completed can change how the whole family feels at the end of the day.
3. Drop the guilt: Don’t be afraid to say “no”
   Opt out of activities that are creating more stress than fun. Avoid sabotaging yourself by wasting your emotional energy on guilty feelings; they will only immobilize you. Stay in the present and focus on the activity at hand.
4. Learn to be flexible
   Get rid of the idea of being perfect. Be willing to compromise. To do this you must first be clear about your limits. Learn to make compromises without shortchanging yourself or others. By being clear about what you can and are willing to do, your children and other family members will know what you are willing to accept.

   Remember, to most children “maybe” means “yes,” especially if they want something. Teach them the difference between “wanting” and “needing.” Having no limits makes it difficult to say “no” or to delegate. Remember that boundaries and limits are essential for balancing your life, but you can’t control everything.

5. Teach your children to put people before things
   When you and your children are grateful and empathetic toward others, you will feel more strongly connected to those around you. As a result, your sense of well-being will be enhanced and you will feel less alone. Reciprocated, non-judgmental caring leads to trust and binds us to one another. It can even help us forgive ourselves when things don’t get done or meet our expectations. When cared for, children and adults develop a greater confidence in their capabilities, as well as their capacity to care for themselves.
6. Be an example of self-care
   Children learn more by example when it comes to developing habits for staying emotionally and physically healthy. Be good to yourself. Create a simple, soothing atmosphere at home and work. Declutter your environment. Eat healthy foods. Exercise regularly. Listen to calming music. Take naps. Find ways to relax whenever you have a free moment. Create family nights. Have parent-child “dates.” Develop family rituals you can all look forward to. Give your family your full attention when you are doing things together, and they will notice and reciprocate.

Weaving family, friendships, activities, and responsibilities together creates a richness and harmony in our lives that is greater than the sum of its separate parts. There is no single formula for balancing work and family. Each of us must decide how to combine our time with our spouses, children, career and hobbies as well as find “me time.” Teaching children how to do this takes patience, but will pay dividends better than any gift you will receive this holiday season.

Peter C. Thomas, Ph.D., is a licensed psychologist and provides psycho-educational evaluations as well as individual, couples and family therapy. He specializes in working with children and adults who have Attention Deficit Disorders and learning disabilities.

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A Balanced Life During the Holiday Season

On top of looking for the perfect gifts during this busy holiday season, I have had the added task of planning the Kids Enabled Resource Fair. This is the third year that I am involved in planning the fair and it is no small feat. It is hard work and takes a good bit of time, but it is the culmination of all I love about Kids Enabled. In a way, it is much like looking for gifts that are the perfect fit.

Children with learning differences are unique and each has his own needs and “gifts.” An intervention such as therapy, a school, a camp or a social outlet can make the difference in helping him reach his full potential. No one child is the same so each intervention is chosen to fit each individual child. So, where do you start to look for these interventions? The Kids Enabled Resource Fair, of course.

The Kids Enabled Resource Fair is energy, palpable hope, wisdom abounding, realization of needs and ways to meet these needs. The majority of attendees are at the beginning of their journey. They come with more questions than answers. It is the ONE place to get a myriad of answers to those questions.

Once they walk through the door, their world will be transformed into a neighborhood of services at their finger tips. They find educators from specialized schools. They find speech and language pathologists and occupational therapists. They find nutritionists and recreational outlets. They find services to bring out the “gifts” that each child may have in drama or art or even martial arts. For those who want to understand what a diagnosis really means, they can visit our scheduled speakers during the afternoon to learn more and ask those questions.

And to give back as our gift, Kids Enabled has created a $250 scholarship to be given to an attendee who RSVPs and registers at the fair that can be used at any summer camp or therapy clinic for any child of their choosing. Now that’s a gift that Kids Enabled is proud to present!

I wish your family a happy and healthy holiday and look forward to seeing you at the Kids Enabled Resource Fair on January 29th. Tell all your friends and family to come too!

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It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year